Mushiatsui...

That's Japanese for humid. I lived in Wyoming growing up where it could easily get to be over 100 degrees Fahrenheit (38 degrees Celcius) in the summers. You could see the heat in transparent waves coming off of the hood of a car or roof of a shed. But it was a dry heat, something I never truly realized until I moved to...

...Virginia Beach, VA. Humidity was new for me, and I found it hard to breathe, having grown up with asthma. Summers there were sometimes stifling. But it was near the ocean and had a breeze which kept it moving, something I never realized until I moved to...

...Middletown, CT, in the Connecticut River Valley. The valley kept the air from moving and so the humidity would just sit there. We would shower three times a day just to keep cool and would still sweat in the middle of summer. But it was pretty far North, being in New England, something I never realized until I moved to...

...Kyoto, Japan. Apparently from what I hear from my students, Kyoto has the most extreme weather in Japan (I'll let you know about the winter when it arrives!). In summers, it has the heat of Wyoming, the southern latitude of Virginia Beach, and sits in a river valley like Connecticut. It's the triple whammy.

I have heard the expression that "the heat hung in the air," and I thought I'd seen that before, but I have today truly seen this for the first time. You can literally see a thick haze in the air. Visibility is reduced. It's like walking through a sauna. I drip with sweat every time I leave my apartment. I shower multiple times a day (once after riding my bike home from work, once before going to sleep, and once before leaving for work). It doesn't make much of a difference. The only time I wear clothes in my apartment is to video chat on Skype. Even my friends in Osaka don't realize what this is like. Going to work there is a relief for me each night.

So here's the bad part. It's only 32 degrees Celcius today (about 89 degress Fahrenheit), but with 83% humidity. It's supposed to get gradually worse until August when it is going to be around 39 degrees Celcius (102.2 degrees Fahrenheit) with 95% humidity!

I'm a little frightened.

I'll keep you posted.

Yukata

Today I bought my first article of Japanese clothing; a yukata. I wanted to get the one you see in the picture here, but it was only available online, and I don't know how long it would take to have it shipped. So I bought one from a store that pretty much only sells kimono and traditional Japanese clothes. It was a bit more expensive, but it's really nice, and it has tigers on it. You'll see photos of me wearing it next month.

I am going with a whole bunch of people to the Gion Matsuri in Kyoto on July 17th. It is the largest festival in Japan each year, and I am excited to see it firsthand. There will be lanterns and geisha and floats (Oh my!)

I decided to do one cultural thing in Japan every month (like Hiroshima in May and Himeji Castle in June...see previous posts). This will be my July event, and in August, I'll be climbing Mount Fuji!

In general, things are looking up. I had a great Japanese class today, my private students are progressing nicely (I have a new one tomorrow who wants help writing formal business letters and speaking appropriately on the phone to clients in the U.S.), my shift swaps were approved for my brother's wedding in August, and it looks like the transfer to a Kyoto branch will happen September 1st. That means starting Aikido is just around the corner. Also, some friends from California (Somkith, Shoichi, and Megan) are coming on three separate trips this fall. It will be nice to have people from home to show around and re-ground myself with.

The only challenge lately is that it's raining EVERY day. Riding home in the rain the other day, my bicycle tire got caught in the train track, and I went down hard. Everything went flying, and my leg is gashed up pretty nicely. Mostly, though, everything is fine. It's just getting old getting soaked on my commute.

So for the most part, I'm feeling excited again to be here and have a lot to look forward to, including wearing my new yukata!

Proud to be...

...who I am.

After a couple of conversations today I am more aware than ever before that it is important to have pride in who you are and where/who/what you come from. I am not one for regret because everything I have done leads up to who I am now. By disavowing my heritage or my country, I am disavowing a part of myself. I may not agree with actions my government has taken, but growing up in the U.S. has enriched and created the person I am today. Why would I disclaim myself just because of the government I happened to be born under? Are all Germans bad people just because they were born with the heritage of a Hitler regime or Communist rule? Are all Arabs bad people because of 9/11? Considering we're only just over 200 years old, I could produce an appallingly long list of atrocities the American government has sanctioned or carried out first-hand. Does that make me a bad person?

The United States is a relatively young nation. And as such, it often acts without thinking through the consequences fully. It has no history of its own to have learned from. It often reacts impetuously, as if it's still defiant of being told what to do (independence was a relatively short time ago, after all). Like a child it is also somewhat shallow and materialistic, focusing on immediate desires and operating from a position of scarcity that needs to be quickly snatched up before it's all gone. As older nations encounter the U.S., they often feed off of the excitement, enjoyment and energy that youth has to offer, wanting a slice of it for themselves. In doing so, many have embraced the bright, shiny materialism and gobbled up the products and images while bad-mouthing the attitude that brought it to them in the first place. Along with the exuberance of youth, the U.S. brings innovation and invention to the global table. Being free from thousands of years of tradition brings with it the advantage of being able to easily think outside of the box and create from that place, as short-sighted as some of those creations may be.

I am often told that I am not the "typical" American. Well I don't know what that means, exactly. I have visited 49 out of 50 states and when I was asked today what I think America is, I could honestly say "I don't know how to answer that. America is a big place." When I lived there, I was surrounded by loving, caring, globally and environmentally conscious, creative individuals. The President's popularity rating is lower than any other president in American history, and it's well under 50%, so I guess that means that the"typical American" doesn't agree with the way the American government is acting either.

I think that we as humans are living cultural experiences with blinders on, accepting what we are taught or told as truth, challenged to pull ourselves out of that "understanding." In college, my concentration was in Women's Studies, and the most valuable thing I got out of that is a double-edged sword: I will never know for the rest of my life what it is truly like to be a woman, & I will spend the rest of my life doing my best to explore and comprehend any perspective that is different from my own, knowing I will never fully be able to understand. This has been part of the driving force behind me traveling to other countries and learning first-hand what others' perspectives are.

If I were to rely on movies, news media, stereotypes and here say, I would only further cement that which I have been told. It has only been through meeting others from other nations and traveling there myself that I have begun to have a slight inkling of what those places are about. In almost every case, I have learned that my preconceptions and expectations were wrong. Whole nations are vilified. Others are pitied as victims. Who are the good guys, and who are the bad guys? That depends on who you ask, of course, which leads me to believe that there is no true answer to that question.

The only truth as I experience it is that which proves to be universal. And what is more universal than the fact that we each have a unique experience and perspective?

Every country has thieves, crooked politicians, and murderers. Every country has artists, humanitarians, and caretakers. Every country has people who think that they are right and everyone else is wrong. Every country has laughter, tears, and love-making.

When I traveled through Europe the first time, people knew I wasn't from their country, but they couldn't place where I was from. The French thought I was Dutch, the Dutch thought I was German, the Germans, Italians, Spanish, and Moroccans thought I was French. Only one person in over 4 months guessed that I was from the U.S. I still get a similar reaction, and that makes me proud too.

Why? Not because I'm proud that nobody thinks I'm American, but because it indicates to me that I truly am becoming a global citizen. And hopefully, as I'm out here absorbing the world and allowing it to change my preconceptions, I too am changing how other people see Americans, removing their blinders as I remove my own.

Would you believe...?

I'm not sure how any of you feel about astrology (I'm not sure how I feel about it either), but right now Mercury is retrograde. Astronomically, this means that the planet seems to be moving in a reverse course in space, due to our relative perspective. This happens three times a year for a few weeks at a time because Mercury rotates around the sun three times as fast as the Earth. Astrologically, during this time, electronics go wacky, communication is often misunderstood, or things get lost in the mail, so to speak. Forward progress is supposedly much more challenging. It's a good time for introspection and not to expect things to go as planned or to be understood.

Well, I've been feeling like I've been swimming upstream ever since I got to Japan. Housing, job, Aikido (lack thereof), money (lack thereof!)...all of them have been serious challenges for me. Well Mercury went retrograde last week, and because I hadn't gotten communication from my office about my shift change or transfer to Kyoto, I thought I'd check it out. Apparently, it had gotten lost in the shuffle, and if I hadn't checked, nothing would be happening.

So yesterday I signed a new contract, meaning I work a few hours less a week, including one less graveyard shift. I also was given a form, confirming my transfer in September so I can eliminate my commute and begin Aikido. Of course, in order to go to my brother's wedding in August, I'm working six days a week for six weeks to get the time off, so I'm actually working more, not less, over the next couple of months. But it will be worth it to get to be present at a monumental occasion for my brother.

Point being, things finally feel like they're moving forward. I can now see a time when I will no longer be working graveyard, no longer be commuting 15 hours a week, and will be able to start Aikido and settle into a routine! Whoo hoo! I feel like I'm finally arriving.

So if things are moving forward when they're supposed to be stopped or backward, does that mean I am experiencing a Mercury retro-retrograde?!?

Ume Alert!

Ume (pronounced "OO-may" are Japanese plums. They are actually more related to the apricot than a plum, having a slightly fuzzy exterior and being smaller than Western plums. They are used here to make some types of wine or liquor, they can be pickled and used as a slightly sour garnish, and they are sometimes dried and eaten as sweets for dessert. I love all of the above.

Right now, it the grocery stores, they have taken over the fruit section, kicking out the melons that had been in season for so long. When you buy juice or candy or popsicles, etc, they are often ume or melon flavored rather then the basic cherry, grape, strawberry, and orange options I'm used to back in the States. (Other popular flavors here are white peach, lemon, cherry blosson, and green tea.) Melons here have a really strong flavor, unlike those back in the US, and green ones like honeydew are never pulpy but rather smooth and quite delicious. They cost a pretty penny too. One melon about the size of an acorn squash, can cost anywhere from 580 yen up to 1300 yen. (That's about $11.00...did I mention that's for ONE?!?) The other anomaly here is that while most things are slightly smaller in Japan, the apples are the size of large grapefruit at home. I've never seen apples that large. But I digress...

I just got back from the grocery store and you can buy giant bins of ume at a time. They have their own section these days. I picked up 25 of them in a bag for about the equivalent of $4.25 and I'm excited to try them. I've never actually had the fruit itself.

One of the things I love about Japan is that they eat in season. They don't try and eat fruit or vegetables all year that aren't being harvested right then. They also eat cooler foods in the summer and somewhat thicker ones in the winter. We do that a bit in the U.S. too, but we also have come to make any food available year-round, losing touch a little bit with eating in harmony with nature.

Soon after I first arrived here last January, we went ume blossom viewing up at the Osaka Castle (different from the Himeji Castle in the posting below). The blossoms were white or pale or hot pink: and nearly as stunning as the famous cherry blossoms. There were hundreds of Japanese people there from newborn to 80 years old, even on a weekday. If you want to see more photos of that trip in February, including some shots of that castle, you can click HERE. Make sure you click on a couple to see the blossoms close up, and yes, that's me in the last photo.

I'm off to try my first fresh ume...

Himeji Castle and Park

After a tight month, we finally got paid on the 15th, and two of my coworkers (Jonathan and Scott) and I decided to go to Himeji castle. Regardless of the money situation, I'm not passing up the opportunity to explore Japan while I'm here, so I decided to do one event a month like this.

So we worked the graveyard shift last night and took off right afterwards this morning. It was about an hour away by train and well worth our time. It's one of the largest castles in Japan and is called the "White Heron" due to it's color. it was built around the year 1600 and was never destroyed through fire or war, so it is still in it's original shape and has been declared a World Cultural heritage Site. It was also featured in You Only Live Twice (a James Bond movie from 1967), the TV miniseries Shogun, and more recently The Last Samurai with Tom Cruise.

We first walked through all nine gardens around it and were able to partake in a traditional Tea Ceremony, eating a Japanese sweet snack and drinking matcha, both served by women wearing kimonos which was one of those unforgettable moments in life. The gardens were stunning, and I took a lot of photos. It was good to get into nature a bit.


The castle itself was crazy to climb, due to its eight stories of steep steps, but the inside was fascinating. We even looked at the well where a woman was killed during samurai times. Her ghost is said to be haunting the well, though there are some discrepancies as to the exact story.

All in all, it was great to get out of my region and see something new (to me!), soaking up another experience here. if you want to see photos, click HERE, and remember you can click on them to make them bigger. The last one is of me pretending to climb into the well.

I've now been awake since I woke up for work last night (27 hours ago!), so I'm going to sign off for now...

Gokiburi Showdown

Gokiburi is Japanese for "cockroach," and I just saw my first one. It was brown, shiny, the size of a 50-cent piece, & apparently rather stupid. It ran under a chair, and when I moved the chair, it ran into the middle of the room. It must have had a death wish because it waited there for me to go get my boot. I hit it, but the resilient one escaped and ran toward my water heater. There it encountered the heel of my boot once more, ending the festivities.

I had heard that they are everywhere during the summer, but (I told myself) I'm clean! Perhaps it was a rogue warrior roach exiled from his clan next door. I'm not usually a fan of killing things, unless they like to sting me. Rather than finding that out on an individual basis, I generally hold entire hives accountable for the past actions of their ancestors. And while roaches don't sting, they tend to lay eggs. Lots of eggs. Not knowing if it was male or female, I didn't take the time to turn it over and check. Instead I decided to relieve this one of it's life before eggs could be lain.

Please forgive me, but THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!

Teacher Spencer?

I posted an ad on a bulletin board, looking for English students for private lessons. One man named Toshiro (call me "Toby" he said) called me, saying that his small English school lost a teacher and he needed someone for 3 lessons Tuesdays from 6-9pm. He offered me 2500 yen (about $21) for each of the three lessons. One class has one student and the other two have two students each. It is a little less money than I was hoping for when teaching more than one student at a time, and it was on my day off. At the same time, at this point, I pretty much need to take what I can get so I agreed to come for one week and try it out anyway.

I was left alone in the upstairs loft of what used to be a sushi restaurant Toby owned before opening the school. Just me and a fan and a dry erase board. For some reason I wasn't nervous. And then the students filed in.

Well, each class was better than the next. I had an amazing time connecting with these students. They were interesting and fun to talk with. I didn't have to have a lesson plan (although I will in the future), so we just talked and got to know one another. As I corrected their grammar or explained concepts to them on the white board and then asked them to put it into practice, I realized: I'm actually teaching!

We had a good time, they asked great questions, and I could see them get better. I'm actually good at this! They were eager students, and I was overwhelmed with the difference between this and what I do in Osaka. I am grateful for my experience at NOVA and the rehearsal time it gave me, preparing me to be a "real" teacher. It was invigorating and exciting to know it could be like this. I have a newfound sense of joy in being here and feel much better about my decision to come to Japan.

I was so energized that my 45-minute bike ride home only took me 25 minutes!

I think I will sleep well again tonight.

Rest and Repose

I was feeling rather isolated yesterday since I don't yet know anyone in Kyoto. On their days off, my coworkers sometimes socialize and later tell me stories of their nights out or even just hanging out in their living rooms together. I am aware that I am on an individual journey here, but sometimes, I feel lonely in a city where almost all of the non-Japanese people are tourists.

Yesterday one of my coworkers, Emily, called and said that they had an extra futon for me to crash on if I wanted to go hang out with her and Scott. I had class in Osaka in the morning anyway, so I caught the train in and we went to a small restaurant/bar call "Absinthe."

On a whim, I decided to have some absinthe and then decided to order a hookah to smoke some cherry-flavored tobacco. I'd first tried a hookah in Turkey (we had apricot tobacco there), and even though I don't usually smoke, it's a nice treat once every few years since the water filters and cools the smoke before it hits your lungs, leaving a subtle sweet cherry taste on your tongue.

Scott asked me a question about my beliefs which sparked a discussion about religion, spirituality, life, afterlife, deja vu, dreaming, non-linear time, multiple dimensions, and the evolution of our consciousness, among other things. I haven't gotten that philosophical in a long time, and I'm sure it was a sight: me discussing metaphysics and religion while gesturing with a hookah and sipping on absinthe.

It was a great feeling to just relax a bit and let loose in a peaceful sort of way. I went back to their place and slept for six hours, dreaming intensely of my grandparents and family, not waking once through the night, something I rarely do.

It's exactly what I needed.

Thank you Emily and Scott...

Drool

So many Japanese people sleep on the train because they are simply exhausted and commute for so long. I looked at my schedule and know that in order to move from the night shift to days, I am going to have to pick up 14 hours of private lessons a week to make up the difference in pay. That means working a total of 48 hours a week and commuting 15 a week.

When I'm not commuting to Osaka anymore, that will give me back 10 hours a week (I'll still have to commute, but only 30 min each way a day). I can dedicate those 10 hours to privates, so that's still 48 hours a week of work, but more time overall for other things like Aikido. Still with me?

Point being, I'm running the risk of becoming one of these Japanese men who works so hard he just passes out on the train. And since I have at least two more months of commuting, I may end up looking like the guy in this photo I took on the train yesterday:

His head kept bobbing around, ending up on the woman's shoulder next to him, then her lap, then the window again. She was trying to sleep too. People here are so concerned with not rocking the boat or disturbing one another that she let him lay with his head in her lap with a horrified look on her face. She didn't know him at all, and she'd rather be disturbed than disturb him. I only hope I get the same treatment when I wake up from drooling all over some lady's purse!

The Great Randini

It was wonderful to have Randy visit, even if it felt so short. He is such a supportive person with a willingness to grow like no other. His sense of humor helps keep me from getting too serious, and knowing he is out there somewhere makes me feel a bit more at peace somehow. His impact on me is nothing short of magical.

Not only did he take time off work to come to a country he wasn't particularly interested in, but he lugged a whole extra suitcase full of things for me from the States and then was left all alone for two nights while I worked. One night he even bravely met a large group of people I work with all at once who had been hearing about him for weeks, all to go to karaoke, something Randy doesn't really enjoy.

I am again grateful for how willing he is to do "what it takes" in a relationship, even if I test those limits.

I have attached a link to pictures from his visit (except for our trip to Hiroshima...for that, see the posting below entitled the same). These photos include: our trip up to Monkey Mountain, the bamboo forest, a place where you can pay to pet puppies, karaoke, a ride on one of the world's largest ferris wheels, Kiyomizu (one of the most famous sites in Japan, nominated to be one of the New Seven Wonders of the World), some Geisha, and Randy "whisking" some green tea in a Japanese tea house. The last picture is a panoramic view of Kyoto from the top of Monkey Mountain. As usual, you can click on the photos to make them larger.

To see the photos, click HERE.

Finally, Randy went for his first practice run today, as he just decided to run in the AIDS Marathon in Hawai'i this year. He never ceases to stop challenging himself, amazing me at the same time. (If you'd like to donate to his run, every little bit counts, even a few bucks. Please leave a comment on this posting, and I'll put you in touch with him)

All I can say is Gambatte, Randy! (see posting below)

Gambatte!

Gambatte (pronounced "Gahm-bah-tay") is a Japanese phrase that means something along the lines of "you can do it!" or "rock on!" or "be strong!" I was riding the train home today, studying writing my kanji (I'm now up to about 55 characters...whoo hoo!) when a smoke-scented older woman with yellow teeth and bad breath asked to sit next to me. At first I was not too thrilled, tired from work and really not wanting to smell her for the next 30 minutes.

She saw me struggling with a couple character combinations and pointed to one, giving me the answer. She asked "muzukashii?" (meaning: is it difficult?) I nodded, not really wanting to engage with her. After a bit, I was reviewing how to write units of time, like "4 hours", "6 weeks", "30 years", etc. She interrupted me again to ask where I was from. I realized I wasn't getting away from her. She began asking me how long I'd been in Japan, how long my commute was, and what the time difference was between here and San Francisco, among other questions. I struggled to converse with her, being completely lost at times.

As I got off the train, she told me "Gambatte!" It wasn't until the train pulled away that I realized her questions were designed to help me practice saying units of time! (the answers are: over 4 months, 90 minutes each way, and 16 hours before, respectively, if you're curious)

She was yet another blessing in (a smelly) disguise. Years ago in Prague, a woman bought me a bottle of wine, hugged me repeatedly, and helped me figure out how to come back to Virginia early after I found out about my mother's cancer. Months before that, a man in Spain took me to the hospital and then nursed me back to health in his home for over a week after I caught a bug in Morocco. Sometimes I forget we are given exactly what we need in this world, and today I'm remembering and honoring every kind stranger I've met on my travels so far and in years to come. They are plentiful, and it inspires me to return the favor. I ask you all to keep that in mind as well.

Oh Clap!

Most Japanese people are easily able to pronounce leading "L"s, as in leap, or lounge, or lap. But when it's in the middle of a word, especially when next to another consonant, it comes out sounding like an "R". Many jokes have been made in American movies and TV shows about this. Today I created a class for three of my more advanced students. I taught them about words like habit, addiction, vice, conscious, intention, and ritual.

When I asked them for an example of a ritual, one of my students named Yoshie told me about how when they go to a shrine and pray, they "wash their hands, gargle, ring a bell, crap twice, bow, and then crap one more time at the shrine." I did all I could not to laugh in her face. They are challenging to correct as students because most of them take it really hard, get down on themselves, and don't speak as much for the rest of the lesson. I had to treat this gently.

One of the other students, however, laughed his head off, knowing what she had said. "Teacher Spencer? Isn't that like saying S-H-I-T?" he asked me. I nodded and asked him to explain it to her (so I wouldn't get in trouble). He told her "crap" is when we us the toilet once a day, and we proceeded to work on saying "clap" for the next 7 or 8 minutes. It wasn't easy for them. I explained to her how important it is, though, so that she's not laughed at in a less forgiving setting.

At the end of the lesson, before saying goodbye, Yoshie said "Teacher Spencer? Thank you for helping me, and I promise not to crap at the shrine ever again." It's moments like these that make it all worth it!

Getting Friendly

I sent out a link today to a few people letting them know about this blog, and I already got many e-mails or posted comments from people whom I love and respect. I hadn’t anticipated (though secretly desired) such an overwhelming response. I really do miss people back in the U.S., even if I’m not exactly missing the U.S. itself. My eyes welled up at a few of these messages, hearing words from people who knew me well when I lived there. I say “knew” only because I’m going through such change that I don’t even know aspects of myself right now, confronting inner, old issues of honor, commitment, jealousy, self-reliance, resourcefulness, and faith.

One of my primary challenges in life has been that of independence. My parents instilled it in me as we left everything comfortable at once and moved from Wyoming to Virginia. That showed me that pulling away into the unknown was a potentially valuable experience, even if I never really grew to like Virginia Beach. And then they ironically struggled with it along side me as I began to assert my own independence in immature ways. We are still dancing with one another around this as I learn that relying on them from time to time does not have to mean giving up my autonomy. I know intellectually that asking for help doesn’t mean I’ve failed, and yet part of me still feels like an adolescent inside when this comes up.

That being said, I do need my friends and their support. Growth can be more difficult when you are surrounded by people who see you in a particular light because your interactions with them tend to reinforce the person they “know” you to be. Knowing I needed to break some old patterns and give mysef the opportunity to grow, I have pulled away while being here.

At the same time, I also feel today how important those connections are and how grateful I am for each and every one of you and your individual infulence on me. I feel your love and return it in kind.

Here are some photos of various people I love and miss: CLICK HERE
I only have photos form the past year or so in my computer at all. If you aren't in one of these and have one of us, please send it to me. Thanks!

Leggo my "Eigo"

Eigo is the Japanese word for English. I just took two weeks off from my Japanese classes because Randy was here and then I was sad he was gone, so I missed one more. It was good to “force” myself to go to both of them this week. For my once-a-week class in Kyoto at the International Community Center, I paid only 800 yen (about $7.00) total for all 16 weeks. Today we spent the whole 90 minutes learning how to say “A is bigger/taller/cheaper/better than B” and “I like A more than B, but I like C most of all.” It’s such a slow process; I am told that two semesters of Japanese is like only one of Spanish, French, Italian, or German. I didn’t really believe it before, but now I see it. I thought maybe it was because those other languages were closer to English. But it turns out that the language and all of its nuances and multiple words for the same thing is actually a bigger language with more to learn.

I also attend one class in Osaka on Tuesdays, the only days I wouldn’t otherwise have to make the 90-minute commute. I may be crazy for taking the ride in just for that, but it’s only 200 yen a month (about $1.70), and it’s the best class I’ve found so far, with a private teacher for me and my old roommate, Stuart. It’s in a room full of tables of the same thing for people from all over the world wanting to learn Japanese. Plus my middle-aged housewife volunteer teacher, Munakatta-sensei, is so sweet and patient with me and all of my endless questions like “how do you distinguish between ‘I did it alone’ (all by myself/with no help) vs. ‘I did it alone’ (all alone/nobody else was with me).” I think I test her limits sometimes, but it’s very rewarding for more than one reason. This week we spent the whole 90 minutes learning how to say “A is next to/under/on/to the left of/to the right of/in front of/behind/inside of/outside of B.” 90 minutes just for that!

I am grateful for the break I took because I had reached a point where I was “surviving” and could say all the things I needed to say to get by like please, thank you, excuse me, ordering food, asking about train tickets, “what time do you close?” and “where is the toilet?” You know…the essentials we take for granted in our own language.

Anyway, I hope my classes help push me into the next level and I feel a new commitment to going to them on a regular basis.

American Influence

I am further convinced that the U.S. is currently the only true superpower in the world, dominating not only political and commercial realms, but cultural as well. As music and movies arrive here, they bring with them phrases and images of America that become trendy. Due primarily to advertising in films, Starbucks Coffee and Apple Computers have become staples here, driving out most of the competition. Not that this isn’t true in the States as well, but I sort of expect it in the corporate homeland that is America. The Japanese love of Disney is just one example (see photo).

In addition, Japanese people work an average of 50-60 hours a week and have no free time. Evidence of this is the fact that the number two free-time activity is “sleeping,” surpassed only by “shopping” (for both women AND men). Number three is “driving.” You often see them sleeping on trains to and from work, just exhausted from their days. They don’t have time for the simple pleasures and due to this, convenience is paramount. McDonalds and KFC are everywhere, and the traditionally healthy Japanese diet is quickly deteriorating, as cost and convenience are winning out. It’s sad to see that the stereotypical overweight American is becoming increasingly Japanese as well.

Along the same vein, it has become trendy to use English phrases and words as well, slowly replacing the Japanese words. At the drycleaners, if I want less starch, I ask for “softo” and if I don’t want the taxi driver to turn, I ask him to go “straighto.” You can order a “furappuchino” or “remon aisu tii” (lemon iced tea) to go with your “hamburugu” and “poteeto furaizu” (French fries). While it’s made it easier for me to communicate at times, just guessing by using an English word with the Japanese accent, it still makes me sad to know that some younger generations don’t even know the Japanese words for these things and grow up thinking that these words actually ARE Japanese. At this point, that’s slowly becoming the truth.

A sign of the times, I suppose…

Reading the Signs

If it wasn't for the pictures, I'd be lost sometimes. The picture to the left is warning you to not chase the deer around the park or leave trash that they could eat and get sick from. The one on the bottom reminds you to pick up after your dog.

The Japanese alphabet is actually 3 different character sets. The first two character sets , Hiragana and Katakana, consist of about 71 characters, each one corresponding to a different syllable sound. If you can read it, you can sound out a word (which doesn't mean you know what it means, just because you can pronounce it!). I am now fairly able to read and write those two sets, which are sort of like their cursive and print.

The third character set, Kanji, stems from ancient Chinese and consists of about 50,000-80,000 characters! Each one can mean a variety of sounds or can stand for a single word. You need to know about 1,500 of them to read the newspaper, and most Japanese people only end up knowing about 2,000-5,000 or so in their lifetime.

Here is something I wrote my first week here:
"We went to the grocery store to buy food today, and we couldn't figure out if the translucent yellow liquid was oil or salad dressing or vinegar or who knows what. It's funny all you take for granted. Everything is written in a language I can't even begin to comprehend! It's not like we could even sound out the words on the packages to figure it out. And nothing looked familiar. Brands from home like Special K or Twix or Welch's are here but use different packaging...their name is written in tiny print in English on the back. It's a bit of culture shock, trying to figure out if I'm buying sesame oil or olive oil or chicken broth or dish soap, since I can't read the labels, and they're all yellow-ish and come in similar packages! We bought so many things without knowing what they are, figuring we could try new things. We had to buy laundry detergent, and I'm sure we found the right area of the store, but did we buy detergent for colors or did it contain bleach, or was it actually fabric softener? I guess we'll find out."

Timing and Torn between Desires

It's been challenging to sort out how long I'm going to be here, when I will return, and where to exactly. I wanted to study Aikido for at least a year, and I haven't even started yet. I wanted to study Thai massage in Chiang Mai at the end of my trip for a month and then relax in Thailand for a week or so right before returning to the States.

I was hoping to not return to the US during my time here, but my brother is getting married this fall, so I'm going back to South Dakota for that. And recently my sister announced her engagement, and the wedding was September 2008, so I was going to be back in time for Burning Man and then that. Then she had to change the date to the end of next June, which wasn't easy for me to deal with. I had finally resigned myself to cutting my time here short by a month and my massage training short by a week when I was told that the wedding date was moved up yet another week! Now I'm really feeling like it's affecting my experience here.

I really didn't want to come back until I felt done. All of this is over a year away, and it all feels so planned out...not what I had in mind when I decided to come to Japan a couple of years ago. I don't want to leave here regretting that I didn't accomplish what I came to do. I also don't want to regret missing out on important family events in the U.S. I tend to live without regret and really feel torn here.

My parents offered to fly me back for the wedding and then back again to Japan or Thailand, wherever I happened to be. That helps, but doesn't solve some of the timing issues like making sure I'm not in Thailand during monsoon season.

And the biggest and most challenging part of all of this for me is Randy. When I planned this years ago, he wasn't in the picture. I hadn't anticipated finding such an amazing partner just before coming here. And it can't be easy for him to be called a partner but not getting equal say in how these things play out. This is an individual journey that was embarked upon before I met him. I have to be true to my feelings for him. And I have to be true to this journey here at the same time. I know that changing my time here could lead to resentment toward him for years to come that I don't want either of us to have to experience. And I want to be with him as much as possible.

I always said I'd be here between one and two years. Now, I'm staying true to that, but it feels like I am hurting him to even consider being here until next August, making some extra money after Amber's wedding and then going to Thailand. He wants me to be back as soon as possible. And I would be lying to say I'm not eager embark on my next journey... my new life with him.

But one chapter at a time. I'm jumping ahead and not being present. Some of these decisions need to be made, and I'm feeling a crunch.

If you have any suggestions or input, I'd love to hear them...

Work

Warning! The following is somewhat of a rant. I guess I'm just spoiled by having had my business for so long and not having to have been in a corporate environment...

Japan itself is great. I love the food, the people, the architecture, the aesthetic, the culture. The language barrier hasn't proven to be as difficult as I had thought it might be. I get along rather well in fact. Basically everything I had concerns about proved to be just fine.

The issues have actually been with things I thought would be easier. Work isn't what I'd hoped for. The pay is not how they represented it, and so affording to live here while still paying debt at home has been a serious stressor for me. If nothing had changed, I would have gotten further into debt and unable to stay here at all. I had to accept loans from people at home, and feeling dependent has never made me feel good about myself. That being said, I am SO grateful for every bit of support I've received! At the moment, I have switched to the night shift to make the money I need to make. I work from 10:30pm until 7:30am with a break from 3-5am. It's messed with my sleeping patterns and eating patterns and social life, but at the moment it's necessary to survive.

This company is truly a nightmare from an administrative angle too. Any changes we want to make require a request more than 30 days in advance, including any days off or vacation time. And then they may not grant those requests, telling you only a few days before you were hoping to have them. the above picture is my company's logo. It's some sort of bunny with a chicken's beak that hatches out of an egg filled with smaller eggs. It makes no sense. Just like the company.

Starting out wasn't easy either. It was difficult to go through training. They sort of threw us in quickly without much instruction. It's weird to be teaching over the computer, and for what I expected out of Japan, the technology is sort of rudimentary, for some reason. they don't seem like they've put too much into the interface. We are running about 7 different types of software at once that don't communicate with one another. The tech training was so tough.

My job isn't satisfying to me. It's more of a customer service job with teaching on the side. I'd much rather be in front of my students, and while it has its rewarding moments, it's not been what I was hoping for. Plus, It's very difficult to make a connection with three students in a 40-minute period. And it's rare that you ever see the same students. There are over 400 English teachers in my center, and over 300,000 students! I don't get to watch their continued growth, so it's sort of a flash in the pan.

That being said, I do love teaching. It's a beautiful thing to help them and watch them grow. I've always been a fan of watching the light bulb go off over someone's head. It's a good feeling. And it turns out that I'm a funny and effective teacher at that. Must be my genes...

Some of our classes are one-on-one right now, and others are three students at a time. I've learned that I'm better at the one-on-ones because I get to actually connect with the students. I've applied to be transferred to a branch classroom location in Kyoto to eliminate my 90-minute each way commute. That should give me more time to take on private students. In fact, I have my first full private lesson in just over an hour and am excited to be teaching two middle-aged housewives. Should be interesting.

Miyajima

Taking a tram and then a ferry, Randy & I went to Miyajima, the location of the “Floating” Tori (gate). It is part of the Shinto creation myth that Japan was created through this area and is one of the most commonly photographed spots in Japan. During low tide you can go out underneath the gate, and during high tide, it looks as if it is floating. We also took a suspended cable car up the side of Mt. Misen and then hiked another half an hour up to the peak where we shared a bottle of wine and then were surprised by a Buddhist ceremony taking place with just a monk and two followers. This monk tends to a fire at the top of the mountain that has been burning for over 1200 years (and was very smoky!) and was eventually used to light the fire at the Peace Memorial. Complete with wild monkeys and overly friendly deer (one tried to eat my shirt in our first 5 minutes there), this is also home to momiji manju, which are maple leaf-shaped, palm-sized pancakes, stuffed with various fillings like custard, red bean paste, or chocolate. We actually got to see them made as we walked down the back streets of Miyajima.

Finding the kind of food we wanted at the hours we wanted it proved to be difficult. That being said, another highlight of this trip included trying okonomiyaki, which is a cabbage and cheese based omelette with various meats or toppings they cook on the heated counter in front of you. I’ve had this before in Osaka, where it originated, but in Hiroshima, it’s known to have soba (buckwheat noodles) added to the mix. We found this little building there where it’s just one diner booth after another of mom-and-pop businesses selling it. Complete with hot sauce and mine topped with squid, it was well worth the search.

See the link at the end of the Hiroshima entry below for photos of Miyajima.

Hiroshima

Hiroshima wasn’t initially at the top of my list of places to visit during my time in Japan. It turned out to be beautiful and sobering at the same time. The city has dedicated itself to peace in the wake of its tragedy. Being the first city to ever be bombed with an atomic blast has definitely left its mark. The photo to the left is of the Dome a few hundred yards away from ground zero, and one of the few buildings to survive. They never repaired it as a reminder. Seeing the Peace Museum, complete with clothes left behind by people immediately burned left my eyes welling with tears. Many parents couldn’t identify their children except, in one case, by the lunch box he was clutching, and in another, the sandal the mother had just patched with cloth from her kimono. One child was riding his tricycle at the time (there's a photo of this if you click on the link below), and another was so caught off-guard that he was more concerned with following proper absence procedures from school the next day than the fact that he was covered in burns. He died the next day. In a surprising moment for us, we happened to witness a class of children come present gifts and origami cranes to the Children’s Peace Memorial, followed by short statements and then a beautiful song. As it turns out, this is a common field trip for schools in Japan, and as that class finished, the next one filed in, presented their version of the gifts and then sang the same song of peace. We were fortunate to catch some of this on film.

The other really notable part of the trip was that we took the shinkansen to get there and away. It’s a light rail train that goes over 300 km/hour (180 miles/hour) and arrived by the time we went to the bathroom and had a couple drinks. I tried to get photos of the front car (it looks like a race car crossed with a jet plane), but it went too fast to capture, even as it pulled into the station!

You can click HERE to see pics of Miyajima and Hiroshima, in that order. There are two pages of photos, which you can click on to enlarge or right-click to save. The second page even shows a model of Hiroshima before the blast and then another of right after.

Welcome!

Well, it's only taken me about 4 and a half months to get this up and going. I hope it was worth the wait. I know I haven't been the best communicator since I got here. It's been a trial and a half, and I'm finally getting settled in Kyoto.

My first few months were full of challenges. My job was misrepresented financially. My housing situation was less than desirable. Needless to say, my initial joy at being in a new land with strange customs and doing my best to communicate and read signs were overshadowed by these issues.

I am changing my work schedule quite a bit, so things still aren't a routine yet. For now, I'm working from about 10:30pm until 7:30am 4 days a week and then one evening, all teaching English to as many as 3 students at a time over the internet. Crazy world we live in!

I'm somewhat frustrated that I haven't started Aikido yet, one of the main reasons I came here. It will start next month. I'm barely studying Japanese, partly because I reached a plateau where I can get by in most situations. That will be changing as well.

Rather than going all the way back in time, I'm going to start with last week and move forward. I will do my best to slowly include all of my past impressions of this bizarre land as I go forward.

Okay, so I hope you enjoy this. I will be including links to a web page with various photos you can enlarge or save if you want. Feel free to post comments as well. Until then...